Over the past few summers I have been taking trips by myself to visit family and friends. During those visits, I usually take a number of days to be by myself because I found that those quiet times help me to sit with the thoughts in my head about what is going on in my life. I like to be alone. I like to experience new places and new people along the way. Last July I was sitting in the hotel bar by myself one evening when a woman came in and sat next to me. We started chatting and before long an hour or more had passed while we shared a conversation on why we were both there alone. We discussed the details of our lives like why we were there, details of our children, where our life paths have taken us and future plans. I mentioned that I had been writing a book, but due to a sad turn of life events that I had tucked it away and stopped writing until I started this website in hopes of finding my words again. This women then told me that she knew both of my endeavors would be successful due to how eloquent I was with my words and actions. Eloquent?! It most definitely left me speechless for a number of reasons. One being that the word eloquent was such a beautiful word that I would never had associated myself to it, and yet here was this complete stranger, that I had only been speaking with for an hour or so, handing me one of the most memorable compliments I had ever received. I am not sure how I responded, but we said our good byes most likely never to meet again.
I got back to my room and started thinking about my loss of words to this women and realized that it was hard for me to just say thank you because I can not easily accept a compliment. It pushes me back and sets me off balance when someone offers me kind words. I truly think there are a lot of us like that, but why? There is so much judgment forced on us, that I know for myself, that I take the critical words and I allow them to stick to me. These are the voices that I listen to that make me doubt what I am doing or who I really am. It is hard to switch the brain from the negative to the positive and that is a really sad thing to have as a reality in life. We don't realize the power of a word or words and how strongly they can effect another human being. Life is so rushed that we don't stop to think how one simple negative statement can make someone else feel. Our words should be about lifting others. Our words should be spent on expressing love and gratitude and trying to create some form of positive energy for the people around us, even the strangers we can meet in a hotel bar. Our words should allow people to think and feel.
This past week I was having one of those WTF days as I was sitting in my studio editing photos. Then I got this Facebook message alert. It was from someone I knew in high school. We weren't friends back then. I don't know if we had ever even talked in high school, but she had sent me the most wonderful message filled with such kind words that it left me in tears. And it had come on a day out of the blue that I had needed it the most, to stay be inspired to stayed focused on my goals. Her words were such an incredible impact on my thoughts that day. And isn’t that something we should all try to do for others? I remember someone once telling me that the way I offered compliments to strangers seemed fake. That I did it for the attention. So for awhile I had stopped, but then I realized that the statement that someone perceived was so untrue. I offered the words because they were in my head, so why not share the compliment with that person instead of remaining quiet because someone else can’t accept you for who you are in offering genuine kindness.
November is known as the month of giving thanks. Maybe it is time to start wearing your heart on your sleeve. Tell the people you love how incredible they are to you. Give a compliment to a stranger. The cliché that life is too short holds so many truths. Be genuinely thankful for every person who crosses your path and the impact that they make on the view of your life. Make your moments count. Be that stranger in the hotel bar that still leave someone speechless. Realize the power of your words and use them to be the person that someone needs to hear from today. Make your words a positive force in a world full of negative. You can never give too much love, so never allow anyone to tell you anything different.
“There is nothing more truly artistic than to love people”~ Vincent VanGogh